My Dysfunctional Relationship with Money


I’ve figured out that I have a dysfunctional relationship with money. This hasn’t come about because I’m inept or unsuccessful, it’s apparently come about because I’m a woman. According to recent studies most women tend to deal with every other hurdle in their lives other than finances. I’ve got to agree that I must be one of those women.

It dates back to our grandfathers not letting our grandmothers have control of the family finances and even though this generation have more control they’ve never been taught how to deal with it. What’s an option? Is it the same as a share? I honestly have no idea. Do you?

It’s embarrassing to admit this but many women don’t let on that they don’t know. They want to be seen to be coping, to be the super woman and one little flaw (like not understanding finance) will undermine the image of today’s coping-with-anything woman.

I only did my tax last week (and I still haven’t posted it). I did my businesses whole accounts over one week instead of the whole year. I only check my bank balance when I know I’ll be struggling to pay a bill. Yes, the last thing on my mind is my money. Or is it truer that it’s always on my mind but I keep putting it into the too-hard basket? Whatever the case the more I read about women not taking control of their finances the more I believed they were talking about me.

I’ve run a successful business. I’ve kept a happy home and fed two healthy sons. I’ve owned homes and paid out mortgages. I’ve volunteered. I’ve held down corporate jobs. I’ve written four book-length manuscripts and countless short stories and articles. I’ve made time for friends and family, sport and fitness. Let’s just say I’ve been as busy as the average woman. How in the hell am I meant to bother with finances at the end of all that?

The one thing I realise is that I need to make time for it. If I don’t take control no one will. My husband is like an ostrich with his head in the sand. He believes a bill will miraculously get paid if you just ignore it. For this reason we find ourselves struggling with money and I’m sick of it.

So I’m taking control. I’m getting in charge of my own destiny. I have a bit more reading to find out how but I’m on the right track. Instead of putting money last (as much of a chore as it seems) I’m going to put it higher on my list. It won’t come first because my family will always come first but it’s got to come close because doesn’t it link to them anyway. Without money how can I protect them? How can I keep a roof over their head and feed them? How can I safeguard their future?

I don’t want to sound materialistic. I’m far from that. I just need to be less scared of money and then, hopefully the result will be I don’t have to worry about it any more.

Happiness is easier to attain with less stress and one major stress seems to be money. If we could get rid off this one problem would it help us find happiness? I don’t believe it always would but it’s gotta make things easier.

Wish me luck and any suggestions would be gratefully appreciated.

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About donnadmunro

Donna Munro is an author, freelance writer, blogger, graphic artist, content writer, book marketer, administrator, web editor and book reader. She's been published in Take Five, The Australian Woman's Weekly, For Me, She, That's Life, Woman's Day and Club Life (as well as smaller publications). She recently formed Warm Witty Publishing to self publish her debut novel 'The Zanzibar Moon', because she's too impatient to wait any longer. Donna lives on the Gold Coast with her husband, youngest son and the weirdo Staffy Mahli. She adores being a grandmother but still feels young. She often joins her husband's pool cleaning business, just for fun (but is unsure if she's all that helpful). She keeps fit and has a fondness for elephants (she sponsors Tundani in Kenya) and owls. You'll often find her digging her toes in the sand while reading a novel at the beach.

Posted on September 6, 2010, in Family life and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. I have heard that it helps to have all your essential receipts sticky taped to the pages of a blank ledger per year, with a number unique to each receipt per year, and to keep a list of receipts and numbers for each year both on your computer and printed out, as well as back-ups, so that if you need to all you have to do is get the number from the list, then turn to the appropriate page in the right ledger.

    What I have been doing is filing away the receipts as well as scanning them and keeping the scanned copies to attach to emails if neccesary.

    Phillip A. Ellis

    Like

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